Sunday, October 26, 2008
Sunday, October 19, 2008
cold weather = wonderful!
Its finally scarf weather, and Im gearing up to start making some new ones! I made the trip to my local yarn store the other day and bought some really nice pale green alpaca yarn that Ive already started working with, and love! This year Im attempting something Ive never done before - Im going to try my hand at making fleece scarves with fun monster designs or something stiched onto them. Hopefully they turn out! Im also thinking about gathering up old wool sweaters and felting them ( wash in really hot water and then dry at the hottest setting ) to make mittens.
On the horizon is a trip to buy pumpkins, making pumpkin pie/soup/bread... obviously Im a big fan of all things pumpkin.... especially Graeters pumpkin icecream which Ive eaten two night in a row now.
To date this fall has been wonderful, amazing things have been happening and I feel like Im exactly where Im meant to be! Life is good!
On the horizon is a trip to buy pumpkins, making pumpkin pie/soup/bread... obviously Im a big fan of all things pumpkin.... especially Graeters pumpkin icecream which Ive eaten two night in a row now.
To date this fall has been wonderful, amazing things have been happening and I feel like Im exactly where Im meant to be! Life is good!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
the last few days of mental freedom
I'm coming to the end of spring break. Depressing, utterly. Although, I have accomplished more than I thought I would over this past week. Wait, correction, over this past glorious week. I have as of now ( as of maybe twenty minutes ago) read 5 novels this week, pretended to work on a poster presentation for the NWSA conference for half and hour while drinking coffee, slept in until 2 pm at least once, and have done generally nothing that I haven't felt like doing. And I didn't even have to go out of the state to do it, as much as going out of the state appeals to the restless streak thats been progressively growing in me. Monday its back to the grind, back to fifteen credit hours, homework, papers, and being an absolute slave to academia in the worst kind of way. Its a bizarre slightly masochistic relationship. I hate how school sucks the life out of me but love the satisfaction of making Deans List at the end of the quarter. Truthfully though I cant wait to graduate.
Ive been rethinking my childhood goal of becoming a writer lately, which has been influenced in every way by rereading 5 Mary Russel novels (see the Laurie R. King link). A person can dream, right? Amazing books, Mary Russel is my new woman literary hero and takes her place beside Nancy Drew. I cant write fiction because I cant seem to swing conversation on the page. However, poetry is another thing. Granted, there is alot of bad poetry. I don't really show people what I write because I'm not all the way sure yet that its not bad poetry, not to be self deprecating, merely realistic. Having the very modest background in academic English lit. that I do, I know something about bad poetry. I find myself writing poetry in my mind almost constantly (strange and dangerous confession). Lately Ive been thinking about Whitman, Ginsberg, Harjo, and Tea. I'm not hip like Michelle Tea, I'm not gritty. But I'm not constantly elegant and earthy like Harjo, and I cant ramble without punctuation at some point like Whitman and Ginsberg. I feel like my poetic voice falls somewhere in between the points where all of those writers meet. And if you have no idea what that means you'll just have to go read them for yourself and find out.
Ive been rethinking my childhood goal of becoming a writer lately, which has been influenced in every way by rereading 5 Mary Russel novels (see the Laurie R. King link). A person can dream, right? Amazing books, Mary Russel is my new woman literary hero and takes her place beside Nancy Drew. I cant write fiction because I cant seem to swing conversation on the page. However, poetry is another thing. Granted, there is alot of bad poetry. I don't really show people what I write because I'm not all the way sure yet that its not bad poetry, not to be self deprecating, merely realistic. Having the very modest background in academic English lit. that I do, I know something about bad poetry. I find myself writing poetry in my mind almost constantly (strange and dangerous confession). Lately Ive been thinking about Whitman, Ginsberg, Harjo, and Tea. I'm not hip like Michelle Tea, I'm not gritty. But I'm not constantly elegant and earthy like Harjo, and I cant ramble without punctuation at some point like Whitman and Ginsberg. I feel like my poetic voice falls somewhere in between the points where all of those writers meet. And if you have no idea what that means you'll just have to go read them for yourself and find out.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
In case anyone wondered if I get heated over politics... the answer is yes.
I'm a obsessive poll checker, but tonight is worse than usual...probably because its Ohio's turn. Who will it be, Obama or Clinton? And by how large or small of a margin? McCain is now officially the Republican candidate for president. I don't even know what to think about that , I'm not even sure I want to try to think about what that could mean for the United States. Just the mention of his name paints a terrifying ( and probably over-exaggerated ) picture in my head of massive anti-gay laws, the eventual (McCain is supposedly pro choice but I'm a cynic ) shut down of abortion clinics and women's health centers, a 100 year war in which we ultimately loose in every way possible, the intensive policing of our borders, the terrorist like surveillance of anyone who resembles A Terrorist, abstinence only education, the consequent rise of teenage pregnancy, STIs, the return of the AIDS epidemic, and massive amounts of back alley way abortions. Not to mention the eventual demise of the United States as we know it. Okay,yes, I know. Its all a bit melodramatic...I cant help it, my feminist critical readings prof. is having us read The Parable of the Talents by Octavia E. Butler (its science fiction and it resembles what I just described.) Anyways.
Onto more fun things. I would like to respond to a great post that was brought to my attention. To preface what I'm going to write, I am all for cynicism. I understand that all of the candidates are a little silly at times...especially Senator Clinton (my personal opinion). I don't particularly trust any politicians as I think that they are for the most part slime balls with money. Whats worse, they're usually white, MALE slime balls with money (backed by more white male slime balls with money). However, taking into consideration the day and age that we live in, one that's filled with all kinds of despair, and pain, poverty, sickness, epidemics, genocides, human trafficking, threats of war, bombs being dropped, kids being shot, campuses being shot up, clinics being bombed, lives being ruined by debt, terror in many many forms, governmental deceit and lawlessness, hate crimes, widespread joblessness, murder, rape, rape, rape, oh, and more rape on top of that, I don't really find anything funny or cynical about a country that for the first time in a long time wants change that could possibly include more than all the middle class fat and happy white men and their wives and offspring in this country. That being said here's the post in question:
"I'm confused. I've been hearing an awful lot of talk about voting for this guy... I think his name is Change. So, I took my ballot and looked for his name, but I couldn't find him. I dug down in the deep ugly crevices of my brain and remembered this other guy named Hope. But he wasn't on the ballot either. All I kept hearing was YES WE CAN! YES WE CAN! YES WE CAN!
Man. I'm bummed. I wanted to be a part of history, but I couldn't find a mythical savior to vote for."
Hm, well not to worry middle class white man, you too can be part of history! Fear not! You can be part of the historical moral majority that holds and has held our country back and down for countless years. Somehow it doesn't seem healthy to be like that. Unhealthy to be so cynical that you cant get your head out of your crusty republican rear and vote for some attempt at change, and yes, hope . I think its time for this country to have some attainable hope shown to them that doesn't come just from the preachers pulpit. When I look at Obama, and I look at the other choices all I can think is yes I am truly ready for some change in the ways of this country. And that is not a false hope, or a joke, a silly desire, a random whim, a non intellectual thought. So laugh about these words that you throw around so easily, this change and this hope. And all I can say is...who looks silly now? Theres nothing silly about change or hope. The only people who think its silly, from where I'm standing, are mostly white men and women who care more about their personal morals and big business than about the idea of a global consciousness.
And true, this "mythical savior" figure might not exist, but don't kid yourself, John McCain is no savior either, hes not even a saint. He is, in my book, on his merry way to becoming the "100 Year War" real deal. Id rather vote for hope and change, than war, doom, destruction, and the preexisting historical legacy of rich white men (or women).
Onto more fun things. I would like to respond to a great post that was brought to my attention. To preface what I'm going to write, I am all for cynicism. I understand that all of the candidates are a little silly at times...especially Senator Clinton (my personal opinion). I don't particularly trust any politicians as I think that they are for the most part slime balls with money. Whats worse, they're usually white, MALE slime balls with money (backed by more white male slime balls with money). However, taking into consideration the day and age that we live in, one that's filled with all kinds of despair, and pain, poverty, sickness, epidemics, genocides, human trafficking, threats of war, bombs being dropped, kids being shot, campuses being shot up, clinics being bombed, lives being ruined by debt, terror in many many forms, governmental deceit and lawlessness, hate crimes, widespread joblessness, murder, rape, rape, rape, oh, and more rape on top of that, I don't really find anything funny or cynical about a country that for the first time in a long time wants change that could possibly include more than all the middle class fat and happy white men and their wives and offspring in this country. That being said here's the post in question:
"I'm confused. I've been hearing an awful lot of talk about voting for this guy... I think his name is Change. So, I took my ballot and looked for his name, but I couldn't find him. I dug down in the deep ugly crevices of my brain and remembered this other guy named Hope. But he wasn't on the ballot either. All I kept hearing was YES WE CAN! YES WE CAN! YES WE CAN!
Man. I'm bummed. I wanted to be a part of history, but I couldn't find a mythical savior to vote for."
Hm, well not to worry middle class white man, you too can be part of history! Fear not! You can be part of the historical moral majority that holds and has held our country back and down for countless years. Somehow it doesn't seem healthy to be like that. Unhealthy to be so cynical that you cant get your head out of your crusty republican rear and vote for some attempt at change, and yes, hope . I think its time for this country to have some attainable hope shown to them that doesn't come just from the preachers pulpit. When I look at Obama, and I look at the other choices all I can think is yes I am truly ready for some change in the ways of this country. And that is not a false hope, or a joke, a silly desire, a random whim, a non intellectual thought. So laugh about these words that you throw around so easily, this change and this hope. And all I can say is...who looks silly now? Theres nothing silly about change or hope. The only people who think its silly, from where I'm standing, are mostly white men and women who care more about their personal morals and big business than about the idea of a global consciousness.
And true, this "mythical savior" figure might not exist, but don't kid yourself, John McCain is no savior either, hes not even a saint. He is, in my book, on his merry way to becoming the "100 Year War" real deal. Id rather vote for hope and change, than war, doom, destruction, and the preexisting historical legacy of rich white men (or women).
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Rain
True fact, when it rains it pours. Fittingly, or ironically, Im writing this in the middle of the thunderstorm thats been dumping on Cincinnati since 1:31 AM, the exact time that I was woken up by the nearby servere weather sirens. Im not kidding, the sirens are about a block from my apartment and they sound way more like air raid sirens. My cat, catching up on his beauty sleep, slept through them. Ive been having a round of bad luck - whatever you want to call it, Ive had it. Relational spats (which have been patched), hearing from my advisor that I have to not only take math for the next year, but I have to take 2 quarters of makeup math before I can enroll in actual math (what the hell is actual math?), my nice and expensive green glasses being stolen practically from off my nose, the tidalwave of homework from professors who I think truely believe their class is the only one that youre taking and that matters, and the near end of my work study financial aid money thats been keeping me afloat. Oh, and my new umbrella I bought on campus today (go UC) broke almost 20 minutes after I bought it with my dwindling supply of pocket cash. Such a sob story! Im usually good at handling stress and taking things in stride, but this month its hitting me harder.
But, the sun is out now, literally, at least for a little while. I have nice cup of coffee in front of me, and writing always helps me to release stress. Optimism is good for your health says my psychology professor, so maybe I should start practicing it a little more.
But, the sun is out now, literally, at least for a little while. I have nice cup of coffee in front of me, and writing always helps me to release stress. Optimism is good for your health says my psychology professor, so maybe I should start practicing it a little more.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Homophobia and intolerance rears its ugly head - again.
The Larry King killing
I swear, the ages involved just seem to get younger and younger. I had a professor recently tell my class that she feels that homophobia is almost gone. She said look how much as been accomplished, look at how free we all are now! I say bullshit. I say that our world is seeing a new breed of hate, one that is deeply internalized within American culture, hidden behind "positive" stereotypes seen on reality TV shows that supposedly help marginalized groups attain centrality. However, what do you say to the fact that there have been more teen and child perpetrated hate crimes and killings committed in the past seven or so years then there ever were during the so called "second wave". Children are not born racist and hateful, this sentiment must have come from somewhere in their social environment. It comes from America's parents, and it comes from religion, and it comes from mis- education, and it comes from shit TV, and trash talk shows that spread hysteria and problematize the Others (those not the norm) instead of spreading truth, and especially from our government that denies gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans gendered, gender fluid, etc. folks basic rights such as the right to not be discriminated against and fired within the workplace based on perceived sexual orientation and identity. Wake up America, even if you don't individually identify as any of those groups, the ability to fire people based on perceived sexual orientation and identity means everyone. It means an infringement on every single person in this country's rights, and we should all be concerned for ourselves and for each other.
Larry King, the boy who was killed, was 15 which is the age of my brother Matt. The idea that my brother, or others his age, could do something to express themselves and their perceived identity that could get them killed in THIS COUNTRY is absolutely disgusting. This country is one of the most hypocritical that I know of. Our government goes on and on about the atrocities committed in "third world countries" and conflict areas, but denies its own citizens rights that set the stage for persecution. Isn't it this country that allows the KKK to continue? And we all know they are a brand of homegrown terrorism and hate if one ever existed. Oh Amerikka.
How do we combat this violence? How do we combat the media, the government, the religion? Its overwhelming to think about. These are things that we all need to be thinking about, even if we don't have kids, even if we didn't know Larry King, even if we don't live in California, even if we think no one we know is gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans gendered, queer, these are things that we need to think about. Things we need to CARE about, follow up on, look for innto. These are issues that we need to stand up for, not let pass us by when we realize that someone is being a complete ass. I truly believe that we all have the responsibility to educate ourselves, our friends, and our family if nothing else.
I swear, the ages involved just seem to get younger and younger. I had a professor recently tell my class that she feels that homophobia is almost gone. She said look how much as been accomplished, look at how free we all are now! I say bullshit. I say that our world is seeing a new breed of hate, one that is deeply internalized within American culture, hidden behind "positive" stereotypes seen on reality TV shows that supposedly help marginalized groups attain centrality. However, what do you say to the fact that there have been more teen and child perpetrated hate crimes and killings committed in the past seven or so years then there ever were during the so called "second wave". Children are not born racist and hateful, this sentiment must have come from somewhere in their social environment. It comes from America's parents, and it comes from religion, and it comes from mis- education, and it comes from shit TV, and trash talk shows that spread hysteria and problematize the Others (those not the norm) instead of spreading truth, and especially from our government that denies gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans gendered, gender fluid, etc. folks basic rights such as the right to not be discriminated against and fired within the workplace based on perceived sexual orientation and identity. Wake up America, even if you don't individually identify as any of those groups, the ability to fire people based on perceived sexual orientation and identity means everyone. It means an infringement on every single person in this country's rights, and we should all be concerned for ourselves and for each other.
Larry King, the boy who was killed, was 15 which is the age of my brother Matt. The idea that my brother, or others his age, could do something to express themselves and their perceived identity that could get them killed in THIS COUNTRY is absolutely disgusting. This country is one of the most hypocritical that I know of. Our government goes on and on about the atrocities committed in "third world countries" and conflict areas, but denies its own citizens rights that set the stage for persecution. Isn't it this country that allows the KKK to continue? And we all know they are a brand of homegrown terrorism and hate if one ever existed. Oh Amerikka.
How do we combat this violence? How do we combat the media, the government, the religion? Its overwhelming to think about. These are things that we all need to be thinking about, even if we don't have kids, even if we didn't know Larry King, even if we don't live in California, even if we think no one we know is gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans gendered, queer, these are things that we need to think about. Things we need to CARE about, follow up on, look for innto. These are issues that we need to stand up for, not let pass us by when we realize that someone is being a complete ass. I truly believe that we all have the responsibility to educate ourselves, our friends, and our family if nothing else.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Saturday, January 19, 2008
The only one
It blows my mind, and backs up my convictions, that the Obama website is the only one out of the three leading Democratic candidates to discuss "first Americans" i.e. "the indians." The forgotten nation within our oh so great one. Plus, not only does he talk about issues and law that are relevant only to first Americans, he specifically addresses the issue of violence against women on reservation land. He also discusses child abuse, drug abuse, weapons abuse, abuse by non-reservation members (reservation law cannot penalize non-reservation members) , etc. Could it be that we actually, FINALLY, have a politician who is ready to bring to the center those who were silent in the margin? Hillary Clinton says nothing about Native women, or Native Americans in general (boy, she really is a champion for women isnt she), and neither does Edwards. I really want to highlight the contrasts between Obama and Hillary. Looking at a candidates website is, I think, one of the best ways right off the bat to get to "know" them. Its just like picking an art college, when you get all those brochures in the mail. Colleges are going to put the best art they have on their brochure. If the art on the brochure is trash, chances are the college sucks. So, right off the bat see who is and especially who isnt included in an individual politicains wide lensed view of the world.
*Obama includes: Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders, African Americans, Americans abroad, Environmentalists, First Americans, Kids, Latinos, LGBT, People of Faith, Students, Women, Vetrans.
These are all off of his official website. One thing that Ive always thought was cool about his site is that he has a drop down menu for "People" which is where I got the titles I just listed. He also then has a drop down menu for "Issues." In doing this I really feel he is acknowledging individual identities, not just issues, but the very personal (perhaps most personal) category of who we know ourselves to be and who we want to be known as in the broader sense.
Clinton includes: To be honest Im not really sure. She says shes the "Champion for women", she talks about immigration, strengthening the middle class, affordable healthcare, improving schools, providing vetren services. So I guess that means all the people who fall under those broad topics, whoever they are. In my opinion, when people are lumped together like that someone (and some grouping of people) are going to fall through the cracks.
Both sites allow people to read it in spanish, which is good.
On a purely asethetic note, Clinton's site is super ugly. Sorry, it is. She needs to get a new web designer. So if her site was an art college brochure, Id throw it in the trash.
One last thing, I really appreciate that on the very first page of the Obama site there is a button that says "Register to Vote" I hate it when people assume that everyone has registered to vote. Especially because alot of times minority groups are scared away from not only voting, but registering to vote. The Obama site provides a safe, personal place to take even the first step. Once again, the Obama campaign is doing a great job at bringing the marginalized to the center.
Look/think for yourself! : http://www.barackobama.com/index.php
http://hillaryclinton.com/
*Obama includes: Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders, African Americans, Americans abroad, Environmentalists, First Americans, Kids, Latinos, LGBT, People of Faith, Students, Women, Vetrans.
These are all off of his official website. One thing that Ive always thought was cool about his site is that he has a drop down menu for "People" which is where I got the titles I just listed. He also then has a drop down menu for "Issues." In doing this I really feel he is acknowledging individual identities, not just issues, but the very personal (perhaps most personal) category of who we know ourselves to be and who we want to be known as in the broader sense.
Clinton includes: To be honest Im not really sure. She says shes the "Champion for women", she talks about immigration, strengthening the middle class, affordable healthcare, improving schools, providing vetren services. So I guess that means all the people who fall under those broad topics, whoever they are. In my opinion, when people are lumped together like that someone (and some grouping of people) are going to fall through the cracks.
Both sites allow people to read it in spanish, which is good.
On a purely asethetic note, Clinton's site is super ugly. Sorry, it is. She needs to get a new web designer. So if her site was an art college brochure, Id throw it in the trash.
One last thing, I really appreciate that on the very first page of the Obama site there is a button that says "Register to Vote" I hate it when people assume that everyone has registered to vote. Especially because alot of times minority groups are scared away from not only voting, but registering to vote. The Obama site provides a safe, personal place to take even the first step. Once again, the Obama campaign is doing a great job at bringing the marginalized to the center.
Look/think for yourself! : http://www.barackobama.com/index.php
http://hillaryclinton.com/
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